Update of his interests.

The most active kids in his class are his friends.
His favorite thing in Blue Tag.
He likes to hide all his things behind our bed rest.
Ben 10 is still his fav cartoon.
According to him everybody wants to marry him because he is different color than all of them.
'Let it go' is his fav song.
India is his country and chennai is not India.
Maths his fav subject.
He likes to go to study but can't understand why they always ask him to study.

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How brave am I ?

Definitely, till date I can't do this.



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Missing

I never really understood why my mom hated when I had to move to another city for work.
Last week I experimented by sending only my son and husband to India for 3 days to get some 'My time'. That's when it hit me so hard how much I miss my son.
I regretted every free time I had in those three days.
Sleep" Every day I slept at 1.00 am and woke up at 7.00am...The sleep that comes so peacefully at 9.00pm when my son is around, refused to come closer me even past 12....
Thanks to my cousin family...they helped to fill the void space during the day time.
Shopping: when he was around, I find reason to leave him at home to go for shopping or my husband to take care of him or complain he doesn't let me shop, but when he was away I did go for shopping and didn't even like a piece for me...got few shorts for him though....
I wanted to do my nails, soak in bath tub, clean my closet...and ended up doing nothing but skype calls...
To be frank, the feeling of not really required by him, hurt me more...Had he cried in India, asking for me could have made me happy...
My mom was happy about how matured her grandson was...how well he handled the separation from me (first time in 5 1/2 years) ..but maybe I let her down by not handling it well, by declaring I will never send my son alone...
When my son came back, his sweet little hug and miss you mama, made me happy...
That's when I realized, how in these past 5 years I needed him more than he need me...More than me entertaining him, he was entertaining me, he was teaching me to enjoy the small things in life...the hug, the kiss, the small meaningless talks....
These three days hit me hard to understand that once this phase of life is gone, it will never be back...
I will have more 'Me time' for another 20-30 years maybe....but this hectic time of 'I need you mom' will not last for more than 2-3 years....
Then it will be only in memory...the empty nights when he goes for camp, please dont hug me in public and so on...will come soon...
I will ask for 'Mom I need you' more than 'My time'......